I agree with so much you said here. Take my son for example: he plays a lot of baseball. Do I love to see his skills progress and his team win? Yes. But for me the big takeaway is that when he started, he was so unbelievably shy that 2 teams in a row he let the coach call him by the WRONG NAME simply because he didn’t feel comfortable talking to others. Next was complete and total meltdowns when he “failed.” Now I see a kid who is a leader on the field by explaining the game to those who are new and a kid who has learned to handle himself when he experiences defeat/struggles.
For me, this is success. He can now go into the world confidently and know that he can face challenges and deal with them when things don’t go his way.
We are careful to honor his requests for “downtime” and recognize when he is doing “too much.” Balance and love for the win.
I agree with so much you said here. Take my son for example: he plays a lot of baseball. Do I love to see his skills progress and his team win? Yes. But for me the big takeaway is that when he started, he was so unbelievably shy that 2 teams in a row he let the coach call him by the WRONG NAME simply because he didn’t feel comfortable talking to others. Next was complete and total meltdowns when he “failed.” Now I see a kid who is a leader on the field by explaining the game to those who are new and a kid who has learned to handle himself when he experiences defeat/struggles.
For me, this is success. He can now go into the world confidently and know that he can face challenges and deal with them when things don’t go his way.
We are careful to honor his requests for “downtime” and recognize when he is doing “too much.” Balance and love for the win.
Also shows how much can change from one point in time to another - the “shy kid” one becomes the leader the next.